As a new father
what I've learned as a new father for the past 10 months
Fatherhood is an extraordinary journey, filled with moments of joy, learning, and transformation. While the purpose of this post is to reflect and journal rather than to boast, I’ve found myself reflecting on the many ways fatherhood has impacted my physical and mental well-being over the past 10 months. As I look back on this time, I can identify several key areas of improvement that, though unexpected, have significantly changed the way I live my life. Let’s explore them.
Sleep Pattern: Prioritizing Rest for Better Functioning
One of the most immediate changes I noticed after becoming a father was my sleep pattern. Before our baby arrived, my sleep schedule was inconsistent at best. I often stayed up late, not necessarily working, but sometimes caught in cycles of anxiety or mindlessly scrolling through social media. I didn’t realize the toll that irregular sleep was taking on my mental and physical health until the baby arrived.
Suddenly, my sleep became a precious commodity. Babies don’t care if you’ve had a long day or need rest—they wake up when they need to, and as parents, we adapt. This forced me into a more rigorous and healthy sleep routine. Knowing that the baby could wake at any moment or that the day would begin sharply at 6 AM meant I had to be in bed at a reasonable hour.
While it might seem like a small change, the benefits have been profound. Better sleep has made me more focused, more patient, and more productive during the day. This is not a temporary change like a New Year’s resolution; it’s a permanent shift that has positively influenced every area of my life.
Stroller Walks: Embracing Physical Activity in New Ways
I’ve always known the importance of exercise, but I was never someone who embraced the idea of jogging with a stroller. For some dads, this works, but for me, it was a bit awkward. However, fatherhood has given me a new perspective on physical activity. Instead of thinking of exercise as something I have to carve out time for, I’ve learned to integrate it into my daily life in more subtle ways.
Taking the baby out for a stroller walk during the day has become a priority. When work allows me the flexibility to work from home, these moments become even more precious. Walking with my baby isn’t about burning calories or building muscle—it’s about being present, getting fresh air, and bonding.
This shift in mindset has been transformative. I’ve realized that physical activity doesn’t have to be high-intensity to be effective. Simply moving regularly and making time for these moments of connection has improved my overall health and well-being. I may not be hitting the gym as often, but I’m moving more than I ever did before.
Spending Habits: Reframing Priorities for a New Life
Perhaps one of the biggest changes fatherhood brings is in how we view our finances. Before becoming a dad, I didn’t think twice about spending money on hobbies, gadgets, or spontaneous purchases. Now, every financial decision is filtered through the lens of our child’s needs. Diapers, toys, daycare, playpens, and other baby essentials suddenly take precedence.
At first, this shift in spending felt restrictive, but over time, it’s given me a new sense of purpose and responsibility. Planning for the future, setting aside money for college, and making sure we’re financially secure as a family has become a priority. This doesn’t mean I no longer enjoy my hobbies—it simply means I’ve become more intentional with how I spend.
In many ways, this new financial perspective has been liberating. It’s helped me focus on what truly matters and has reduced impulsive spending on things I don’t need. Being a father has made me more thoughtful and disciplined in ways I didn’t expect.
Screen Time: A Conscious Effort to Be Present
In today’s digital age, screens are everywhere, and it’s easy to get sucked into the trap of constantly checking your phone or having the TV on as background noise. Before our baby arrived, I didn’t think much about this. But now, I’m acutely aware of the influence screens can have on young children. We’ve made a conscious decision to limit screen time in our home, particularly when the baby is around.
I’m guilty of checking my phone too often, but we’ve implemented a rule: no TV while the baby is present. I might turn it on briefly to catch the score of a game, but I make sure to turn it off and refocus on other activities. This has not only benefited our child but it’s been a healthy change for me as well.
Without the constant distraction of screens, I’ve found myself more engaged in household activities and more present in family life. Instead of passively watching TV, I’m participating in meaningful interactions, and when I do want to catch up on sports, I’ve found alternatives like ESPN radio that allow me to stay informed without being glued to a screen.
Fatherhood: A Lasting Impact
In reflecting on these changes, it’s clear that fatherhood has required me to adopt healthier habits—habits that have had a lasting and positive impact on my life. These aren’t superficial adjustments, but deep, meaningful shifts that have improved my physical health, mental well-being, and overall outlook on life.
Being a father has given me a sense of purpose that goes far beyond the fleeting motivation of a New Year’s resolution. My father raised me without the luxuries of smartphones, the internet, or instant access to information through tools like Google or ChatGPT. While it’s easy to idealize the simplicity of those days, I realize that today’s world presents its unique challenges, especially when it comes to distraction and attention.
As a new father in the digital age, I’m more conscious than ever of how I spend my time and energy. Each moment matters, and the presence of my child has made me more aware of the choices I make every day. Distractions are more prevalent than ever, but so is the opportunity to choose what we focus on.
In a world filled with constant noise and demands for our attention, fatherhood has taught me to prioritize what truly matters: being present for my child, taking care of my health, and embracing the joys and responsibilities of family life. It’s not always easy, but it’s certainly worth it. The lessons I’ve learned in these first 10 months of fatherhood will shape me for years to come, and I wouldn’t trade them for anything.
